Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
