Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
