Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
