My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
