doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
