and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
