This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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