writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
