Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
