I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
