We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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