why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
