im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I could fuck to npr.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
