so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
