my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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