it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
