Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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