I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
