Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
