Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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