my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize