OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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