You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
