dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
