And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
