I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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