is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
