I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
The air taste purple.
Randomize
