I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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