You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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