im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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