Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
