Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize