what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
two words...techno handjob
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
