Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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