i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
