: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
