Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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