he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
