she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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