This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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