THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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