You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
