I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
