All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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