Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize