is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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