bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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