Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
