where does the pee come out of this thing
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
